Advice from teenage mothers?

In all my other question i have asked about teenage pregnancy,


the trouble is that im still not put of becoming one..


Yes im a virgin. and i have just turned 14.. but i really want a child..


Its really not a kid to dress up or too coo over or to show off with, just my love or babies and kids. belive me i'v tried not to think about it so much, i even got a kitten to take my mind or it.. NOT WORKING :D





can any teenage mothers tell me what it was like and there storys??


if it was good, tell me. if it was bad, tell me..








HOPEFULLY THIS WILL HELP





thanks xAdvice from teenage mothers?
I had my first son at 16 and believe me...WAIT! As long as possible. I love my son to death and my children are my life but I do wish I had waited and been able to experience normal teenage things. I am still with my children's father (my husband) and since we started so young things are a constant struggle. Children are not just there when it is convienient for you...they are always there! Are you really prepared to give up every bit of freedom you have to bring a child into the world? Please think about the child and not just what you want. My first son was not planned (although I would not change having him for the world), and had it of been planned I would have waited until I was finished with school and college before having a child. Don't get me wrong, it is a struggle and my children are well worth it, but why put yourself into that situation if you don't have to? Hopefully this helps.Advice from teenage mothers?
You need to think of yourself in say 5 years. Right now you might think you want a baby (heaven knows why) but you will miss your freedom and life experience. And to be a parent means being selfless...are you really being selfless by wanting a baby at 14? How would you pay for it? What sort of life could you offer a baby when you are a kid yourself? You have no life experience so how can you raise a child? That is selfish and therefore you are not ready to be a parent if you are happy to bring a child into this world when you can offer them nothing.
I feel as though that if your trying to have a kid at 14, your trying to use that kid to fill something in your life. Its not going to work. You need to find something else to fill that void. Getting pregnant is a precious thing, but not that young.





Talk to a school counselor or a psychiatrist before you get pregnant. And I don't think any boy your age, knowingly wants a child that young.





Don't fill voids in your life with children.
baby sit


seriously dont have a kid


it messes your life up


im 15 and i have 3 little sisters there 3 , 6 and 12 and they drive me freekin crazy


ask your parents if you can baby sit or somthing because kids are a lot of responseability


and jeez you wont be able to do anything


like think of prom and going to the movies with friends and like shows and what not


you cant tdo it


and god it sounds painful right ?
Don't do it.


Seriously, wait til you're married, living independantly and have a job that will support you financially. You want your child to have the perfect life, right? I'm not saying thats the only way they will, but it helps SO much more.


I'm 31 weeks pregnant, 18 years old, single and living at home with my mom. Do i want that for my child? No. My baby wasnt planned (completely wanted and loved though) but i wish SO much that it could have waited til i was old enough to do it all perfectly.
Hmmmm...PLEASE enjoy being a kid...your a baby wanting a baby.





I have a friend who had a baby at 14. Though she loves her son more then anything she didn't graduate H.S, she got her GED instead, she had NOOO social life, no guys wanted to date her and she was robbed of her childhood.





Please wait till you've atleast graduated H.S
14 years old? Way to throw your life away.
learn to be completely selfless and be on ur best behavior
I understand your situation completely, because there are SO many teen girls who just want a baby to love completely and feel that they are loved back unconditionally. I'm 17 years old, and I found out I was pregnant in November. It was not planned whatsoever and my boyfriend of a couple months was the one who got me pregnant. We were both so scared, but now it's gotten a lot better. But, we're still going to struggle for a few years after the baby comes until we're financially stable. I'm very lucky because my boyfriend wants to be with me and raise the baby together, but most girls aren't as lucky and the father leaves a lot of the time. So, I understand that you want a baby, but 14 is so young, and you will struggle so much.





Here's what I would do.


Research all you can on teen mothers/pregnancy/birth etc. and I guarantee you that you might think a little differently.


If not, it's ultimately your decision, but I highly suggest you wait until you're in a loving relationship w/ a guy who also wants a child, are financially able to support your baby, and have the responsibility and energy it takes to give up many things to take care of that baby.
do you like to sleep in? do you like having time to yourself? do you like hanging out with your friends? do you want to have a career so you can be independent? if you have a child you won't get to sleep in for years. you won't have any time to yourself. if you have a baby, do you think that your friends are going to want to hand out with you all the time? you won't be able to go out to parties or to the movies or even school dances. you will struggle to finish high school and then you will get a minimum wage paying job that you will hate and you will barely get by. you will struggle to feed and clothe yourself and your child. you have to be completely selfless and always put your child first. by purposefully having a baby at such a young age, you're not thinking about the child. you're being selfish and only thinking about yourself.





believe me, you want to experience life first.
You are right. Having a child can be a wonderful experience.





It is also VERY hard. It is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I was 24 and married when my first was born. It was still hard. I can't imagine having a child as a teenager.





Focus on enjoying your life as a teenager and school right now. Keep the kids goal in your life, just for in the future. You want your kids to have the best possible life, right? So focus on giving them that. A well educated mother who can afford to give them a good life, and a well rounded mother who doesn't resent them because she didn't have a chance to live her life before the kids came along.





You can get all kinds of experience with kids. Babysit, work at a daycare or volunteer at a summer camp. They will give you a good background on children. But I promise you that those experiences will not prepare you to be a parent.





Being a parent is 24/7. You can't hand them over when you're tired or when you have something more fun to do.
I was nineteen when I had my oldest son. I lived in my dad's house with my boyfriend for several years until we finally had enough money to be able to live on our own, because I worked two jobs and my bf worked one. We never saw each other because we worked opposite shifts so someone could be home with the baby because we couldn't afford daycare. We had to live with family member off and on into our early twenties. My son had to have state medical and dental coverage. I had to take him to crappy little dentist offices that didn't even look like they should be operating. We had to have government aid at times to have enough food. Sometimes we had no money for gas and had to walk or bike to work. We had to buy all our clothes at garage sales and thrift stores. Here's a question... what about having a baby THIS MINUTE is so important? If you want one so bad why can't you hold off until you are at least 18? You can always have a baby later but you can't give one back once you have it. Do you have any idea how expensive it is to raise a baby? If you are so keen on having a baby because you will be a loving mother, think about your hypothetical baby. That baby deserves to have a mother who graduated high school and tried to get a pretty good job to support it. That baby deserves to have a father, not just any random teenage boy who you trick into knocking you up. Don't be stupid. If you really want to be a mother you will do what is best for your future children and get into a position where you will be able to have a family and enjoy them, and where they will be able to have you there with them, not working three jobs to survive. Where are your parents? Do you not get enough attention or love from them? Is one of them not around? You are lacking in love and trying to fill it with a baby... and I am here to tell you babies take a lot more than they give for a long time. They are wonderful, beautiful, and precious, but they are a big responsibility and you need to be ready for that. Don't you watch Tyra? And don't even get me started on what you have to do to get pregnant in the first place... are you ready to accept that if you have unprotected sex with a boy and he has HIV that you and your baby are then at risk for HIV? Or if he has herpes or warts or whatever... PLEASE think this over logically. You are not being fair to yourself, to your future kids, to the possible dad, and to whoever is going to end up watching your kid while you can't, probably your mom.... good luck. please be smart.





ps i am not with the father of my first two anymore. I am with a wonderful supportive man. We have an almost five month old baby and it is so nice to be able to enjoy my baby and not have to worry every minute about whether we have enough money to eat. But still finances are not perfect and we have to budget. Right now especially is NOT the time to be making this decision. The world is suffering financially and many people can't feed the kids they already have because they are out of work. Are you going to feed your baby on the $7.50 an hour you'll make at McDonald's? I'm not saying don't have kids. I'm saying don't have them YET. Best of luck to you.
i was 18 when i had my daughter. Let me tell you that you have no idea what you are getting yourself into until you have the baby home for the first night. I love my daughter more than anything and wouldnt change anything for the world but its a reality check when you actually have the baby. If you think you're ready for a baby stay awake for 2 weeks straight with maybe an hour nap here or there and get a cd of a baby crying and play it all night...haha. Yes they are cute and love you unconditionally but thats only one aspect of motherhood. And if you are 14 you have to think about your schooling..what will you do with the baby when you have school.. best thing is to wait till you have your life together.